


Counting The Days 'til I'm Home

by FMelodyCassiel



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Pining, cinderella ball, liam is a sort of cupid, louis and harry are married, there's Briana too, they broke up
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-19
Updated: 2016-02-08
Packaged: 2018-05-02 10:21:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5244734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FMelodyCassiel/pseuds/FMelodyCassiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam approaches him, hugging Louis. “Are you okay?you’re pale..” he says pointing it out.<br/>“I’m fine Liam..and thanks ,  as usual, for pointing out how beautiful am I. You’re a friend!” Louis replies.<br/>Liam laughs so loud that some people turns around to look at them. “Not for me to enhance your beauty..mate” whispers then, calming down.<br/>Louis feels his own cheeks burn, while forces himself not to think about Harry.<br/>Luckily, his mother claims his attention , so after a pat on Liam shoulder , Louis goes to her.<br/>“Are you ready to start, love?People are getting nervous!”<br/>“Well, people can go fuck theirs-“<br/>“Louis William Tomlinson!” she interrupts him “What’s the matter?!everything is going so good. Don’t panic now that you’re ending!” Johanna warns him trying to lower her voice.<br/>“You menaged to collect so much money for those kids, and can’t even imagines how much I’m proud of you..but, please, calm down!” she ends , starting to fix his mussed hair.<br/>“Did you understand?”<br/>“Good. Now you go out there. They’re waiting.” She says, leaving him a kiss on his cheek , disappearing in the crowd.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter I

“Ladies and gentleman, if Niall shows up, don’t let him in!” ends the speech Louis.  
The room is immediatly filled by claps and he can’t help but feel excited.  
The lights on him are blinding so he narrows his eyes to be able to look trough the crowd.  
Louis finds Liam right in the corner, in his black tuxedo, hand in hand with Sophia.  
His sister Fizzy, further away, is wearing a beautiful dark dress , and is smiling to him from across the room.  
An hot hand lingers on his shoulder and Louis turns around just to meet the warm eyes of his mother.  
She mimics an “I love you” and send him a kiss. Louis smiles to her.  
His heart is beating fast in his ribcage for how much happy he is.  
Louis was waiting for this moment for a while. And even if this moment is remembering to him that this could be the one and only ball for the kids , making is heart ache, on the other hand he can’t not to be happy to be the reason of their smiles.  
It’s not long before he finds himself stuck in the embrace of some of the guests, shoulders shaking from the pats of his friends, cheeks burning from the kisses of his sisters.  
But, the only thing he want to do right now is meet those kids and make them feel specials.  
Because is what they deserves.  
The kids are all reunited in a large room full of games.  
Their laughs are filling his ears, their smiles his eyes.  
Someone wraps fingers around his trousers and Louis lowers his gaze to meet the one of a beautiful princess.  
Louis stretch his arms and lift her from the ground.  
“Hey Sue, are you having fun?” he asks her, smiling.  
The child looks at him for several seconds then whispers “ How do you know my name?”  
“Oh” Louis exclaims “ I’m a prince so I have to know the names of every little princess in this room!” says kissing her cheek.  
She giggles and Louis would cry because ..she’s so small, and it’s not fair at all.  
Tears are clouding his view, so he squeezes Sue and take a deep breath.  
“So, princess” his voice trembling “ would you like to dance with me?” asks.  
“And, I don’t accept a no!” Louis adds.  
Sue laughs, crinkling her nose , and is simply adorable.  
“Ok” she whispers, her smile widening.  
Louis squeezes one of her tiny hand in his own , holding her against his chest with the other.  
Then , following the music, Louis starts to move.  
Inevitably he thinks about the little girls in his arms , how long she’ll live because of her brain tumor.  
Inevitably, a tear leaves his eyes.  
And, okay, he should be strong in this moment, but he can’t help it. Louis is human.  
He notice some of the kids doing the same of him and Sue, and a wet laugh escapes his mouth.  
They all have about nine-ten years , but They are a force of nature  
He learned so much during the past weeks.  
The music ends and after leaving a kiss on Sue’s forehead , Louis take her for the hand and goes to say hello to the other kids, calling them name by name.  
To be able to know their names was really important to him. For this reason he had spent several days trying to remind them.  
“Louis?” Alberto is calling him from across the room , after what seems to be an eternity spent to play with the kids.  
“People are waiting for you for the auction” he informs Louis.  
“I’m coming..” he answers.  
Alberto nods, then goes out of the room.  
Louis check the time on the clock in his wrist. Shortly the kids have to go back to the hospital.  
With a sigh he lift himself from the floor, causing a general protest.  
“Where are you going?!” asks Ellen, hand in hand with a kid next to her.  
“Oh!”he exclaims “ i’m going to do my beauty sleep, obviously!How do you think I can be so handsome without my sleep?” he asks faking exasperation and making the kids laugh.  
“It’s a duty that every princess and prince have!So, who wants to go to sleep e become the most beautiful princess/prince of ever?”  
“Tomorrow we’ll see all again!So?”Louis adds smiling.  
The kids starts screaming several things, nodding towards him.  
So, with a heavy heart, Louis nods to the nurses , saying them to take away the kids.  
Louis gives to each one of them a kiss, hugging Sue.  
“See you tomorrow” he whispers to her, kissing her hot cheek.  
Then he leaves the room.  
The guests are sitting around the tables, sipping champagne and eating food.  
Louis winces. He hates all this. He hates having to deal with fake people.  
Louis hates don’t be able to do anything for those kids.  
He loves all of them.  
Liam approaches him, hugging Louis. “Are you okay?you’re pale..” he says pointing it out.  
“I’m fine Liam..and thanks , as usual, for pointing out how beautiful am I. You’re a friend!” Louis replies.  
Liam laughs so loud that some people turn around to look at them. “Not for me to enhance your beauty..mate” whispers then, calming down.  
Louis feels his own cheeks burn, while forces himself not to think about Harry.  
Luckily, his mother claims his attention , so after a pat on Liam shoulder , Louis goes to her.  
“Are you ready to start, love?People are getting nervous!”  
“Well, people can go fuck themse-“  
“Louis William Tomlinson!” she interrupts him “What’s the matter?!everything is going so good. Don’t panic now that you’re ending!” Johanna warns him trying to lower her voice.  
“You menaged to collect so much money for those kids, and can’t even imagines how much I’m proud of you..but, please, calm down!” she ends , starting to fix his mussed hair.  
“Did you understand?”  
Louis look to his mum right in her eyes, similar to his own, full of love,and he can’t help but nod.  
“Okay mum..”he whispers  
“Good. Now you go out there. They’re waiting.” She says, leaving him a kiss on his cheek , disappearing in the crowd.

**

Louis has already sold many things.  
Liam has bought the guitar autographed by Niall and Louis has bet money that Liam will go out from the party rigged as a fairy.  
Louis blesses that one of his brothers is here for him.  
Someone put in his hand the next object to sell, and it’s in that moment that the world collapses on him, when the smell of one of Harry’s shirts comes to his nostrils making him shiver.  
He squeezes in between his hands the shirt that had once bound his boyfriend's waist, trying to calm himself down.  
He and Harry don’t get along for weeks by now, indeed who can blame Harry when the guilt is obviously his own? He screwed up, and now he has to pay the consequences.  
But, Harry is his heart and , how someone lives without it?  
Louis too has noticed the changes in Harry, beginning with his behavior on stage.  
Since Zayn had left the group, Harry and Louis had started to interact on stage again. After two whole years of ignoring each other, the atmosphere all around them was all electric and their fans seemed to have gone mad .

 

 

 

Harry on stage always looked for his gaze.  
He did it when he sang Little Things.  
He did it when he sang No Control.  
In between Stockholm Syndrome's notes.  
During 18.  
Since that 4th of August, when he was forced to confirm Briana's pregnancy even if it was uncertain, Harry hadn’t looked for his gaze no more and that only meant that he had failed . That he had disappointed but especially hurt him inexorably.  
Without forgetting the outburst by Zayn after the show and the guilt that had gripped him because he had disappointed him too, to whom he had promised to let himself go, to lead to one step forward his relationship with Harry . To whom he had promised that he would finally make Harry happy.  
A cough brings him back to reality, and Louis imposes himself to calm down; he imposes himself to think about his personal life only after all that.  
So : “The next object it’s one of Harry Styles shirts..offers start from one thousand dollars” he says on the microphone.  
The shirt ends up in the hands of a fan.

**

Louis is drunk.  
Or that's what he thinks.  
Actually, he's in that state when something makes him laugh, but he is somehow quite sober to understand what’s is happening around him.  
Louis is locked in a room behind the stage , away from everything and everyone.  
His phone is abandoned on a table and Louis is staring at it like it's the most despicable object in the universe.  
But he's only angry because he tried more than once to call Harry and after the sixth call the phone has shut down in the middle of a rather embarrassing voicemail.  
Louis takes another sip of vodka, but it goes sideways, making him choke.  
Louis rubs a hand over his face , cursing.  
He doesn’t want to do the same things he did during his sister's birthday, when he had ended up fighting with Harry who had left the party early.  
So, determinate, he gets up from the little couch where he was sitting, but his head starts to spin, making him stumble on the floor.  
A sharp pain catches him on the wrist, making him moan.  
Louis bursts out a laugh because the situation is ridiculous.   
What had began as a wonderful night has now become a real disaster , because his mind leads him inevitably to those green eyes redolent of contempt and disappointment, full of disdain and disappointment.

 

[…]

“ You just had to pretend to go out with her , Louis ! You pretended four years to be with Eleanor, four!An evening is enough for you to make this mess?! Why Louis? Was it necessary to go to bed with her ?! She ... I almost want to laugh !I was cheated …WITH A GIRL LOUIS!” screams Harry once again in that morning.  
“Harry, calm down , please!Since when do you believe more to the web’s rumors rather than to me? I told you I didn’t go to bed with her!It’s false!You have to believe me!”  
He needs Harry to believe him.  
Harry lowers his head, the curls hiding his face. A sigh escapes his mouth and several seconds later he is crying.  
His shoulders are shaking from the sobs so Louis wraps an arm around his waist , squeezing him.  
“Ssh Harry, I can’t see you like this. You’re breaking my heart..” he whispers, trying to contain his own tears.”Shh..I love you. Please don’t cry.”

[…]

“What’re you doing on the floor?”  
A voice breaks in between his thoughts making him trail.  
Liam looks at him, a frown in his face and his cheeks red.  
Louis stares at him for seconds with teary eyes, then “Harry broke up with me” he blurts out , starting to cry.  
Liam sighs before sitting on the floor and wrapping Louis with both arms, hugging him tight.  
“Harry didn’t broke up with you”  
“Yes, he did.”  
“No, he didn't.”  
“Then why doesn’t he call me anymore? He left me, I told you.”  
“You’re acting like a child”  
“Don’t use that word!”  
“Which word? Child?”  
Louis nudges him in the ribs, making him moan in pain.  
“What the fuck Louis?!” he blurts out “Are you crazy?” Liam says massaging the injured side.  
Louis doesn’t answer and simply tries to drift away from Liam's arms, who didn’t let go of him.  
Feeling Louis shaking in his arms is destabilizing. The situation between him and Harry is critic and after five years he can’t help but feel personally involved.  
“Liam?” Louis calls his name, turning in his arms and making their eyes meet.  
“Mmm?”  
“…I’m not sure if I didn’t go to bed with her.” He whispers.  
Liam stills.  
Since the notice had spread out, Louis has never been clear with no one. With none of them.  
This confession can’t help but disconcert him.  
“W-what do you mean?” he asks, shocked.  
Louis sighs before “What I mean is that that night I was very very drunk and I don’t remember a thing” saying. “Nothing. What if I did it for real?!What if that child is real?!What do I do?!Liam..” Louis screams.  
Hot tears are streaming down his cheeks, making of him a real mess.  
Liam would search one right answer, but he doesn’t have one. It’d be useless lying.  
This is serious.  
So “Louis?” he calls.  
Nothing.  
“Louis..”he tries again.  
Louis doesn’t answer.  
“Harry asked me to keep an eye on you” Liam confesses then.”The night you two fought, he asked me to not leave you alone.  
Do you know what does this means? It means that even if he is broken and angry with you, even if he should focus on himself, he puts you ahead of everything and everyone.   
Harry loves you and he showed it to you in several ways during all these years, and if there is something that in five years has been an assurance for me, it was your love, guys. I saw you going through so many problems and you came out of them much stronger. So, I don’t know what will happen in this moment, but I’m sure about one thing.   
You two may have broken up physically , but mentally and spiritually you are one thing, inseparable for the rest of the life.”  
Louis has stopped trembling and isn’t crying anymore.  
His heart is warming, while everything doesn’t seem completely dark like before.  
Harry loves him. Harry put him ahead of everything. Again.  
Louis has to reconquer Harry.


	2. Chapter II

…The door closes behind Harry, and Louis feels like he’s dying. Because it hurts more like this than if that door had slammed.  
It’s like if Harry had no forces to rebel.  
Louis want that Harry had slammed that door.

Louis wakes up, limbs heavy with sleep, head aching and wet face.  
He looks around himself disorientated because…he’s not at his home. Their.  
His chest hurts but Louis promptly avoids it in favor of finding out where he is.  
The room in which he is has walls rather unstressed , of a pastel yellow and with a few drawings here and there in the corners of the ceiling.  
There are no posters or photos , only a few of those paintings that hang on the walls just to give an extra touch to the room , even if they are horrible.  
What's? He has always been quite frank.

And his fans know that. Still he can not understand why they like this side of him .  
"Because. Is. Tremendously. Exciting. Lou .. " Harry had told him once , while they were huddled on the couch of the curly one , while they were exploring twitter.  
Louis had kissed him. Needless to say, they ended up having sex on the living room of Harry .  
Louis shouts out from the head the image of their bodies intertwined , pushing back the covers from his body and resting his feet on the cold floor .  
The stomach is in turmoil but Louis doesn’t want to throw up. He hates to do it.  
Harry have never understood this about him .  
He leaps up, heading for the door to open it .  
Louis finds himself immediately in a corridor ..completely unknown to his eyes , and the panic begins to take possession of him . Where is he? And if he went to bed with someone ?  
Now he has to throw up.  
Louis hears some voices and following them he find himself in what he supposes is the lounge.  
There are several armchairs and a white couch. The parquet is black and it creates a strange contrast whit the rest of the room.  
It seems to be in a different house.  
The differences with the other rooms are absurd.  
The TV is on and is transmitting an episode of Tom and Jerry .

Finally , Louis realizes that there are the two people cuddled on the couch and he spots the long hair of Sophia and Liam’s messed crest.  
Louis clears his voice and those two turn around smiling to him.  
“Louis! Good Mornings!” says Sophia “ How’re you feeling? Do you want something? Tea, coffee , milk?” she asks.  
Louis smiles to her and “ Tea is okay, thank you very much Soph. and good morning to you too.”  
Sophia gets up from the couch giving him a kiss on his left cheek and heading for the kitchen.

Louis smiles and walks to the couch where Liam is watching the cartoon , a cup of milk and cereals on his legs .  
He throws himself on the couch emitting a puff .  
" My head is aching" he informs his friend , massaging is temples.  
Liam gives him a long stare that has him blushing.  
" In the mirror of the bathroom there are painkillers " then he says , putting a spoonful of cereal into his mouth .  
" Mmm .. " is his answer .  
Louis observes Tom putting some cheese in front of the den of the mouse.  
“So, where are we?” he asks ,watching the cartoon.  
“Soph’s house. She bought it a while ago but there is a lot of work to do . I think we’ll come to live here” Liam admits without looking him on the face.  
“Okay? I mean, if this is what you want..she is a good girl, especially since she is able to kick your ass when you need it , just like me ! " he jokes.  
“Heey!” the other protests .  
Louis laughs. “Where is my phone? I have to call Har-“ he immediately stops , sending back those words that are leaving a bitter taste on his mouth.  
Liam doesn’t say a word but puts and hand on his knee squeezing it.  
Sophia arrives from the other room carrying a tray full of things. There are a cup of fuming tea, sugar, milk, honey and painkillers.  
The girls giggles seeing is expression and “ I didn’t know how you take it” says.  
She sets the tray on the table and then goes to sit next to Liam cuddling on his side.  
“Thanks Soph, you’re lovely “ Louis thanks her “ and thanks for giving me hospitality too” adds.  
“No worries, it was a pleasure. Last night you were rather upset, and my home was near so.. you can come here when you want! The doors are always open for you guys!”  
Liam kisses her on the lips squeezing her to his chest.  
They are really cute together and Louis feels uncomfortable. He feels likes those paintings .. so out of place.  
And is mind, traitor, reminds to him that now he can’t have all that.  
It reminds to him that he have to work hard to have an ounce of happiness.  
Louis looks at them one last time before of sipping his tea.  
He takes the milk and pours a bit in it. No sugar.

[...]  
Louis is in the kitchen of the xfactor house. He’s living in there from weeks now but he still hasn’t learned how to move there.  
The guys are all divided between the upper floor, the music class and downstairs.  
He smiles thinking about the fortune that has kissed them giving them the opportunity to live their dream.  
Louis thinks about the auditions, to how much he was nervous, to the meeting with Harry – smiles.  
The memory of the smell of Harry’s hair tickles his nostrils making his stomach twist.  
His cheeks reddens when he thinks about the way they slept the previous night when harry had waked him up, slipping in his bed, just to talk and then they have felled asleep cuddled to each other.  
“Ahia!” blurts out making the hot kettles fall from his hands.  
He curses himself for his distraction.  
Louis put his finger under the cold water watching sadly half of the kettles content pouring on the floor, splattering everything.  
He curses to Harry too because is his fault, and of his stupid dimples and deep green eyes , because since they meet the guy occupies every part of his mind.  
Harry who the previous night have admitted to him to be bisexual.  
Louis haven’t answered him but have squeezed Harry to his chest against the furious beating of his own heart.  
He closes the water taking a napkin and wrapping it around his fingers , then puts again the kettle on and takes a rag starting to dry everything up.  
A laugh fills his ears making him lift the head.  
Harry is on the door, an amused look and shining eyes.  
“I can’t leave you alone for a moment that you makes damages!” he says laughing.

 

“Ehy!” Louis protests, crumpling the napkin between his fingers and throwing it to him " it 's your fault " lets out biting his own lips.  
“Why?”  
“Because if YOU had come to make the tea , all this , "he says pointing to the floor " would not have happened . " He concludes with a shrug .  
Harry bursts out a laugh and “ it’s not my fault if you don’t even know how to heat the water!” points out.  
Louis pouts and then looks for the kettle.  
“Luckily there’s enough water!” he exclaims grabbing two cups and two tea bags.  
He pours the water and then grabs the sugar.  
“Wooo, what are you doing?!” asks Harry blocking his wrist in the air.  
“I’m putting some sugar in the tea?” Louis asks confused.  
“I can see it Louis. The question is : why?"  
Louis lifts an eyebrow not understanding Harry who lifts the side of his mouth in a grin and “ if you adds the sugar you wont feel the real taste of the tea, Loueh. So, today no sugar. I’ll get you used to drink it naturally” Harry explains taking away the spoon from his hands and putting it back in its place .  
Louis makes a face , but doesn’t protest because.. is Harry .  
[ ...]

 

The sliding doors of the oncology department close behind his shoulders ..shoulders that seem to keep the weight of a thousand worlds together .  
That afternoon, like he had promised, Louis had gone to visit those kids , but had not been welcomed by the smiles that he expected to receive.  
He had asked to the nurse what the problem was and she had said that the kids were sad because Sue were ill.  
Just hearing her name had made him shiver and thinks about her hot cheeks the previous night.  
So, Louis had done everything to make the kids laugh and after several hours he had gone to visit Sue.  
He had found her asleep , under the covers, reddened cheeks.  
Louis sighs and climbs in the car where Alberto is waiting for him.  
“How did it go?” he asks.  
“As usual” he sighs “Sue was ill” adds then ,the shoulders down , his eyes sad .  
“You can’t do anything Louis, you know it. But the fact the you go to visit them everyday , making them have fun and making their last years , months , or days of life , radiant is the best thing you could do. " he says squeezing his shoulder.  
Louis smiles to him turning on the car.  
Luckily he is surrounded by beautiful people.  
But.. Louis want Harry, he want to smell his scent, he want to wrap his fingers in those curls and bite the delicate skin behind his ear, and fill his own ears with Harry’s moans.  
“I’m going to Doncaster” he blurts out when when an avalanche of sadness overwhelms him making his eyes sting .  
He want to go home and pretend everything is okay. Pretend for once to be a simple guy who go to bed only to wake up the next day and go to school.  
But, Louis is sure, the fate , traitor, would put Harry on is life in one way or another .  
Alberto sighs- he can’t do anything to stop Louis and honestly he believes that it can be good for the boy to stay away for a while.  
“Okay! He says then “ do you need to go somewhere first?”  
“No, I’m okay like this, thanks.”  
“Well..” he exclaims , hugging Louis and getting off the car “Be careful then!” he says before of shutting the door.  
Louis nods and turns on the radio trying not to think, then starts to guide towards Doncaster.  
\--  
Several hours later Louis is in front of his childhood home.  
He knows he will be alone in that house because his family is still in London.  
Louis get out of the car and fishes from his jeans his bunch of keys.  
As usual Louis takes immediately the right key and then he enters.  
The darkness and the familiar smell of home invests him.  
He takes off his jacket from his shoulders dropping it on the floor, and then his shoes leaving them there too and without turning on the lights Louis goes upstairs.  
He takes all the calm of the world , feeling drained and ..lonely .  
Not physically , but inside .  
He has many people around him who love him and for this he will be infinitely grateful .  
But the only person who Louis want is not beside him .  
He opens the door of his room , launching himself in the bed .  
Releases a long sigh , then without undressing, slips under the covers , pillow tight around the arms to occupy a place that is not its , and the cell tight between his fingers .  
He feels the muscles relax , and without even realizing it he is already falling asleep .  
But before of closing definitely his eyes, Louis presses once again the call button , and just when he’s falling asleep, a voice answers the call .  
" Louis .. " whispers Harry .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so!Hii! :D  
> Here I am again ahaha I know I'm late but i wrote another Larry and I lost my time behind it!  
> Anyways I hope you liked this second chapter and I'd like to know what you think about it.  
> And, sorry if there are errors..I tried to translate it in the right way.. but I'm human and not English ahaha  
> So, feel free to correct me!  
> Again, thank you very much!  
> Byeee ! Fabs ;)


	3. Chapter III

"Louis.." whispers Harry.  
Louis's eyes widen. All the sleep , slips away from his bones, while Harry's voice reaches his hears and is brain like a sweet melody.  
His heart skips a beat, making him feel a bit dizzy.  
"Harry!" Louis exclaims surprised, beacause he answered to the call.  
Harry answered.  
The curly one sighs on the other side of the phone and for a moment Louis thinks that Harry is going to hang up, but as always the younger surprises him.  
"How are you?" he asks.  
How he is?Good question. He feels broken, this is sure. It's like he is in a sort state of trans. it's like the life around Louis keeps going on and he is stuck there watching passively everything.  
But "Now that I'm earing your voice better.." Louis wispers, broken voice, eyes squeezed to keep himself from crying.  
"Louis, are y-" tries Harry.  
"I miss you" blurts out Louis, starting to cry.  
" It's only four days Louis." Retorts Harry.  
Louis tries not to moan to that almost physical pain he feels because ... Harry didn't say 'you too'.  
"I can't resist a day without you, Harry.."  
Louis hears Harry breaths abruptly and he know the curly one is going to say something, maybe to attack him, but then all he does is keep the silence.  
Their breaths are mixing and Louis pretends Harry is there right next to him, keeping him warm with his skin and lulling him with his voice.  
"I'm sorry.." Louis mumbles yawning.  
Harry ignores him to "Are you tired?" asks.  
"I need you!Please Harry, please.."  
"Go to sleep , Louis.."  
One, two, tree, four. Louis feels stubbed everywhere. He hates being ignored, mostly by Harry, mostly if something so important.  
But is Harry, so he can't help but surrender.  
"Goodnight Harry, I love you.." he whispers then.  
"Goodnight Louis..and, I miss you too.." confesses Harry before closing the call.  
Louis smiles for the first time that day.

 

**  
Louis grabs the remote changing channel. He is Doncaster from two day now and all he has done is stay on the couch watching trash Tv and clean the kitchen from the food.  
His phone is full of unanswered calls. At this point Liam has to be quite pissed.  
In that fourty-eight hours, Lous tried to call Harry again, trying to talk to him , but they were all unanswered.  
He relieved on loop the conversation done with the curly one and he couldn't help but feel patetic.  
Since when did he become so weak?  
The phone's screen lights up making him groan.   
Louis push the green botton and before he can bring it to his ear, the angry voice of his best friend fills the air.   
"Hi to you too, Liam."  
"Hi?!Louis , where the hell are you? I'm trying to call you fom two days!"  
"If I haven't answered the calls there's to be a reason ..don't you think?!" he snaps.  
Liam falls silent and the only thing Louis hears is the caos on the other side of the phone.  
"Did I do something?You're angry.. did it bother you seeing me with Sophia?" he asks , guiltily.  
and Louis can imagine him. Furrowed browns, red cheeks.  
Louis laughs.  
"Liam, Liam!What are you talking about?! I just needed some time to be alone. I'm in Doncaster." He says stopping Liam.  
"Oh, thanks God. You had me worried. I called Alberto too but he didn't tell where you were...So, How're you?Do you nee-" starts asking Liam, but his voice comes only as a stupid and annoying backgroud noise because, is Harry who he heard on the other side of the phone?  
For a moment he believes he's allucinating and then Louis looks at the Tv to be sure there isn't one of their last interwiev on.  
But it's transmitting a stupid cook's programm and there's no trace of his Harry, so..  
"Where are you Liam?" he asks suddendly.  
"I'm at the restaurant with Soph.." he says too much calmly, and Louis know Liam from five years now and Louis knows he is lying.  
Louis tries to give him a second chance.  
"And..?"  
"And what?We are taking something to eat and then we'll g-"  
"Is there Harry with you?"Where are you Liam?Please, I need to see him.." he interrupts Liam.  
For several moments no one say a word, and all Louis can hears is anger builds up in his bones.  
Anger towards himself.  
Anger towards Liam.  
Anger towards Harry.  
Anger towwards the whole situation.  
"Liam?" he asks trying to breath correctly.  
"There's only Soph here, Louis.."  
"I heard his voice!!" he screams.  
He's missing Harry like the air.  
It's hard.  
"Louis, calm down please!" tries Liam "There's no reason to act like this!I told you he's not here.." he whispers.  
"There's no reason?!Liam are you listening to yourself?I can't help but thinking about the delusion on Harry face, to his words, at the fact that maybe I'll never gain his trust again!He believes I betrayed him and you know what?!Maybe he is right because I don't remember a thing, but I'm sure I didn't do anything!I couldn''t!I didn't do it in for years when I was with El..why should I do it with the first that passed ?! " he says, suddenly tired.  
"So, please don't tell there's no reason to act like this!" he adds.  
Liam doesn't speak.  
He is probably mulling over his words already feeling guilty and Louis for once doesn't care about it.  
"I'm coming to London" he says ending the call.  
He stares to the Tv , not really looking.  
He needs to take Harry back and he's ready to do everything.  
But first of all Louis needs to look at him in those green eyes and repeat to him how much Louis loves him.  
Louis goes upstairs heading for the bathroom.  
His mind begins to work, providing him with pleasent and painful memories at the same time, and soon enough is hand is reaching for his growing erection.

Harry slams him against the wall of the shower making their wet skins collide and producing such an obscene noise that make him more excited.  
Louis fixs his gaze on Harry's red and swollen lips and with a momentum he grabs his lower lips between his theeth pushing togheter their erections in the same time.  
Louis catchs the groans of the younger between hot kisses and smiles thinking about the fact that between the two of them the smallest one is him.  
Harry grabs him from under his thighs lifting him up and urging him to fasten his legs around his waist, then without warning Harry grabs Louis' erection between his hands starting to stroke.  
"H-Harry" he moans, trying to breathe.  
He feels overwhelmed by Harry.  
By his body.  
By his smell.  
By his love.  
Louis kisses Harry while the younger enters in him with two fingers.  
Harry chuckles on his lips while repeatedly hitting his prostate making Louis moans obscenely.  
More than once Harry told him he finds exciting his being noisy during sex and for this reason Louis screams every time.  
"Asshole.." moans Louis on his lips grabbing Harry's hairs whom tilts his neck leaving exposed that skin Louis loves so much to beat.  
Lou has often scolded him for this.  
Louis slides his hands on Harry's wet chest grabbing his erection, but soon he have to leave it because Harry increases the speed of his fingers forcing him to throw his own head back.  
Louis brings his hands on Harry's arms then, squeezing them."Harry!" he screams ,coming between their chests.  
He places his feet on the ground while Harry humps twice against his legs before coming with a strangled moan.

Louis opens his eyes, heavy breathe and dirty hands.  
Throws his head back against the shower wall.  
It'll be more difficult than he thought.

**  
When Louis arrives in London the first thing he does is going to Liam's house, but obviously no one answers the door.  
For a moment he considers the idea of waiting him outside, but then the thought tha Liam could be at Soph crosses his mind.  
Luckily Liam's flat is not that far away, so after few minutes he finds himself in front of that house that received him only two days before.  
He rings the bell once, two, three times.  
The anxiety grows inside him when the faint hope that on the other side of the door might be Harry.  
His stomach twist and his hearts stop.  
When Liam opens the door Louis sighs.  
He doesn't know if for the relief or the disappointment.  
Liam lets him enter and Louis decides immediatly not to look at his best friend almost naked body.  
Probably he interrupted somthing.  
Louis doesn't care anyways.  
"Where's Harry?" he asks.  
Liam looks at him like he his a soul in pain. "Louis" he starts but Louis interrupts him immediately.  
"Liam please, I need it. I need to see him" he mumbles looking Liam with teary eyes.  
"He's at mine.." he sighs then.  
Louis freezes.  
"What does that mean?!I was there a few minutes ago and no one answered the door. Why is he there?!" he screams feeling teased.  
Harry was there and probably he saw him while he tried to enter in the flat.  
"He asked me a place where to stay.. and I'm not often at home so I told him he could stay there."  
Liam has a glass of water between his hands and Louis doesn't even know when he went to take it.  
"But.."  
Louis doesn't know what to say. He feels like a child the first day of school.  
He opens his mouth but his own phone starts ringing.  
Louis grabs it without looking . "Harry" he blurts out  
But the voice he hears is not the sweet and hot as the sun of his curly, but that of a woman.  
He blinks confused trying to associate that voice to a face.  
"Dr. Mc Coy?" he asks sitting on the sofa.  
"Hello Mr Tomlinson..I'm sorry to bother you, but.." she stops and Louis heart skips a beat.  
"B-but?"  
The woman sighs before of "I have to tell you that Sue..Sue died this afternoon" whisperin, voice broken. "I'm sorry.." she says knowing how much Louis as attaccked to her.  
Louis lets the phone slide on the couch covering his face with his hand.  
"What's going on?!" asks Liam.  
Louis wants to scream out all his anger and his pain. But the only thing he hears is the voice in his head telling hime everithing is going to hell.  
Louis'd like a bottle of Vodka, but he promised not to touch alcool.  
"Sue" he says.  
There's no need to say anything else.  
Liam notices Sophia enter in the room but he tells her to leave them alone, then take a seat and hugs Liam.  
Louis shakes beacuese of the sobs.  
Liam stretches and grabs a set of keys, making them falls on Louis legs.  
Louis looks at them, then looks at Liam.  
Louis' eyes are wide open and a dripping nose, but it's not important when he hugs Liam.  
"Thanks, thanks, thanks.."  
Liam chuckles. "Don make me regret it, and please solve it!You need to talk. I've had enough of your long faces.You are Harry and Louis, you have to be togheter."  
Louis laughs. "I promise you, I'll do it" he says hugging Liam one last time before going out.  
Liam doesn't call Harry. They need to talk after all.  
**  
Louis walks to Liam’s flat.  
He regrets it ten minutes later when he meets two fans in front of a bar.  
Louis knows the girls saw his red eyes.  
Louis however asks them to wait until the next day to publish the photo.  
He hopes he can trust them.  
When Louis is in front of the flat, his legs are shaking and his heart is beating too fast.  
What if Harry is not home?  
What if he doesn’t want to talk to him?  
If.If.If.

 

The glass of the front door restores him his own image.  
His eyes are really red and rimmed by dark circles - fortunately - not too deep.  
His hairs are all out of place.  
The keys in his fingers divert his attention from his distorted image.  
He opens the door and walks up the three flights of stairs.  
From the outside it does not perceive any noise, but Louis does not doubt.  
Harry has always been the silent type.  
Louis takes a deep breath, "Please, please .." he whispers before inserting the key into the lock and open the door.  
The first thing he notices as soon as he puts foot in the apartment is the silence that reigns supreme.  
The rooms are immersed in the darkness, and Louis for a moment wonders if it is not empty and all he is doing is useless.  
He puts the keys on the table at the entrance, takes off his shoes - knowing that if he leaves patches Liam will have him pay for it dearly - penetrating into the darkness.  
His hopes pops up suddenly when he reaches the kitchen.  
The door is closed, and a small glimmer of light penetrates from under the wood.  
Louis Knocks once against the doorjamb, feeling stupid.  
Who knocks at the door of a kitchen?  
On second thought, it might scare Harry.  
Unfortunately, no answer comes to him, so after a deep breathe Louis lowers the handle.  
Harry sat on one of the island stools.  
His head is resting on the cold marble, his long hair scattered everywhere.  
His eyes are closed, and his lips are stretched into a small pout. Cheeks flushed.  
Louis feels his heart melt at that sweet vision and without a second thought he approaches the boy and dips his fingers through his hair.  
He closes his eyes to the pleasant and familiar feeling just found , but the next moment winces when he hears Harry moving under his fingers.  
"L-Lou .." whispers the younger, holding back a yawn and pushing against his hand.  
Louis has the breath caught in his throat and everything seems to freeze for seconds that seem endless.  
But Harry interrupts those moments immediately standing up. "Louis!" Screams with wide eyes, reaching such a high note that for a moment makes both forget about the tension between them and making them laugh.  
Harry laughs, throwing his head back, showing all his beauty.  
Louis instead has his arms resting on knees and laughs uncontrollably without understanding why.  
He laughs because he is happy to hear Harry laugh..  
He laughs because Harry is absurdly beautiful.  
But soon the only one laughing in that kitchen is him.  
Harry is staring at him with a curious look, and a mixture of curiosity and disbelief.  
"What are you doing here Louis? "He asks, strangely calm.  
The heart of the brown startled to hear his name come out from those sculpted lips.  
The laughter subside suddenly and just after a few moment it leaves pace to the tears.  
Harry jumps, taken aback.  
Louis is not a guy who cries.  
He feels his heart squeeze.  
Louis has an arm up to cover his eyes, while holding the lips closed to restrain the sobs.  
Harry has never seen him cry in this way and before he can think again, he gets up from his stool and grabs him by the hips clinging to him.  
His scent fills Harry’s nostrils making his guts twist.  
He wonders if it was right to leave him alone in their apartment.  
Harry is no longer angry.  
Or at least .. not the same.  
But his anger is directed also against himself because he doubted Louis and what kind of person would doubt of you after swearing love a thousand and one times?  
Harry really feels like shit for this.  
But the fact is that Harry is not ready yet to forgive him, to return with him.  
"Ssh..ssh" he whispers squeezing Louis.  
Louis wraps his arms around Harry’s waist , enjoying that contact.  
He would like to make love with him at that moment, but Harry is tense and is not really the right time.  
He plunges his nose in the crook of his neck, inspiring.  
"I'm sorry .." he starts "I'm really sorry. I did not want it to end this way. I'm a horrible person and probably you're right when you say that for once I should take my responsabilities.  
I'm just a stupid child, trapped in the body of a twenty-three.  
I do everything without thinking and I’m probably the most imperfect person on the planet.  
I do not know what happened that night, "he whispers, feeling Harry tremble" but I am certain that I have not betrayed you. But if I did you have to know that I was not aware of what I was doing. And I know it may seem a trivial excuse, but I need you to believe me when I tell you that I love you madly, and that I would never do it.  
You are the love of my life, you're my home, my safe haven, my cage, my anchor. " he continues clinging to his body.  
He rests his ear up to Harry’s heart feeling it beating furiously against his chest.  
"So, please, I beg you .. give me a second chance. I need you more than the air I breathe. I can not do it if you're not with me. "He mutters starting to whine.  
Harry sighs and "I-I don’t know Louis.. I don’t mean that I no longer trust you because it would be a lie, but ... I don’t feel to get back together."  
Louis is sure he feels his own heart broke into pieces, but he’d be lying if he said that he didn’t expected it.Then " we need to restart " he says.  
" I'll be your friend first of all , I'd do anything, I swear, just to have you back in my life . These last few days have been terribles ..and please Harreh.. please ? " he Finishes whispering and looking into his eyes .  
Harry stares intently into his eyes for what seems an eternity .  
Those eyes. so deep and sincere .  
" Okay .. " then Harry mutters .  
A smile breaks in two Louis 's face.  
" Okay " he repeats placing one last time his lips on Harry’s. "Thanks you."  
A kiss that marks an end but also the beginning of something new .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I'm laaate!  
> I hope you liked it!  
> I was thinking..there's someone who can help me correct the chapter the next time??  
> Please let me know! xx

**Author's Note:**

> Okaaaaay, first of all :Hii :D  
> I'm Fabiola , and I'm italian, but you can call me Fabs!  
> This is my own story , and I decided to translate it.  
> So I'd like to know if there are errors..but first of all..I'd like to know if you like it!  
> The story have six chapters..so..let me know!  
> Kisses xx


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